- On February 18, 2015
- 0 Comments
- Capturing the Moment, Equality, SAHM
It’s an odd thing to recap a day at home with kids. When my husband asks, I either go blank, or I suspect that he’s joined the hordes of people asking mothers to prove that we accomplished worthwhile things during the day. Since I’m still adjusting to where my time goes when home with kids, it can be a little hard to remain pleasant at the end of a ten hour shift as I explain how many times I gave the baby a bath or how many hours it took to do our school day.
I find myself thinking/saying: I DO ALL THE THINGS. ALL THE TIME. FOR ALL THE PEOPLE. (And many of those things are so menial they would never be listed on a job description.)
Recently, I realized that my husband just wants to know what his lovely wife and kids are up to, and not so that he can secretly report back to the Commission on Making Women Justify Themselves. (I’m pretty sure that’s a real thing, since we as a culture spend a lot of time judging and criticizing women for being too slovenly, too perfect, working outside the home, not working outside the home, having kids too young, having kids too old, having kids, not having kids, etc. There isn’t a corresponding obsession with how men spend their time, other than sometimes noting that being a sports widow with kids is not the better end of the deal.)
Since it seems like I am years away from being zen and chatty when 5 o’clock rolls around, I can use a blog to illustrate what it’s like around here. I’m tempted to be Super Positive and say, “Mostly, it’s awesome, but sometimes it’s a little crazy.” But that doesn’t really do it justice. I can’t even say what it mostly is, because it shifts so much. Sometimes, we have a day that is idyllic, but I’m not enjoying it because I am so burnt out from the preceding three days of mayhem and inter-family terrorism. Other days, the kids are off their game, but I’m on mine, and it all seems very doable. And some days, it all does gel perfectly and I’m not missing the moment.
The problem with not journaling or somehow capturing the days is that when I’m having a bad one, it feels like that’s all there is. I telescope back to the last daymare and forget about all the days when things were pretty good, or I could easily see God’s grace being poured out on us.
So, that’s my why: communicating with mi esposo, capturing what it’s really like around here, and finding a way to remind myself that it’s worth doing, even when “it” is scraping yogurt out of highchair straps and wiping up the floor under the table for the 5th time today. And if I keep in better touch with friends? That will be a much-appreciated bonus.